I don't know, but I have the entire liberal-media establishment at my disposal. Aw, let's see, that company running the bike tour in South Carolina says no singles.
The same manipulation machine that got people to vote for Barack Obama, and donate all that money after Rainstorm Katrina. I'm going to tell Drew that I'm having a little welcome-to-the-building party for him, but there is no party and then when he shows up I'll laugh and say, 'Oh it's the wrong night.' And then he'll laugh and say, 'One glass couldn't hurt,' and then I will put my mouth on his mouth. Uh, your credit card called, they want to make sure you're the one buying cream soda in bulk.
White people stole jazz, rock and roll, Will Smith, Is this the way my life is supposed to play out?
The kid who walked four miles every Saturday to caddy because mother said golf was a game for businessmen?
Paid his way through Princeton by working the day shift at the graveyard and the night shift at that Days Inn?
Am I trying to instigate fights by throwing wine at people just to get on camera, and maybe also promote my new lifestyle website, Jennas-Side.com? I mean, is wine-throwing something that even gets you on a reality show?
I believe that when you have a problem, you talk it over with your priest, or your tailor, or the mute elevator porter at your men's club, and you take that problem and crush it with your mind vice.
But for lesser beings like curly-haired men and people who need glasses, therapy can help.
Sometimes a place is so special to you, it feels like it couldn't possibly continue after you're gone. I hate to bail, but I've been asked to do a commercial for the Boys and Girls Club of America, and I just can't turn down community service. This message is coming to you either from beyond the grave or because I am in the grip of insanity.
After I left Kentucky Mountain Bible College, it still kept going. Because if I do, that judge will make me join the Coast Guard. The first generation works their fingers to the bone making things; the next generation goes to college and innovates new ideas. The purpose of these DVDs is to educate and guide you through life in my absence. The Donaghys originally come from Ireland's little-known County Steve, where historically we were whiskey testers in goblins. I won the Avery Blaine Handsomeness scholarship to Princeton, and then attended Harvard Business School, where I was voted Most. I was the first person ever to say "I need a vacation from this vacation." The song "You're So Vain" was in fact written..me.
The third generation snowboards and takes improv classes. I'm sorry, sir, I was just sweeping your terrace and you came in and I was trapped.
Just like the time I was cleaning my closet and my mom and her friend Ron came in to take one of their grunting naps on the bed.
First, [Kenneth], I need you to go to the dry cleaners for me and find out how martinizing works. Then I need you to be back by noon to make the bathroom smell like sandalwood before I wreck it.